How to Feel Better

6 min readOct 30, 2019

Photo by Sweet Ice Cream Photography on Unsplash

There will be days when its difficult to go out there and win the day, there will be days when its difficult to even get yourself out of bed, there will be days when you don’t even want to sleep in avoidance of tomorrow. Please know that it is perfectly fine to feel this way and we all have our moments.

For prolonged period of low mood, please seek help from a professional. I have been through a similar period in my life where my world turned upside down for seasons and it was with great courage that when I took the first step to seek help that I realize the world wants good things for every individual. You deserve good things and you deserve a good life.

Here are 8 suggestions on how to feel better which have helped me tremendously on my path towards recovery and on the days when I fall back to old unhelpful patterns of living. May the resources here be helpful for you in any way 😊 p.s. I am currently not a professional and this is by no means an alternative to seeking actual help.

1. Be mindful of your self-talk/ the scenes you play in your head

Awareness is the first step to making changes. Be non-judgmental when you hear/ see the way you speak to/ treat yourself. Whenever you catch unkind thoughts about yourself, reflect upon it and ask: Will I say this to my best friend? If you would not say something unkind to someone else, why will you do that to yourself?

Refrain from engaging in self-sabotage (creating dramas that set you up for failure — in a conversation/ in the work environment/ in going after your dream). Understand that everyone’s been through self-doubt, you are not alone and it is ok.

Change unhelpful beliefs into empowering thoughts. For really good examples on how to do this, refer to: Think this, not that by Mel Robbins (click here for Youtube version of Mel Robbin’s Mindsetreset program, which is FREE)

“The most powerful words in the universe are the words you say to yourself” — Marie Forleo

“Your mind is always eavesdropping on your self-talk; your brain is like a supercomputer, and your self-talk is the program it will run” — Jim Kwik

2. Sleep

Nonnegotiable 7–8 hours of sleep. This is a fact we all know but as said “Common sense is not common practice” — Stephen Covey. Sleep is important. You are worth the rest, you are worth better mood, give yourself that of which you deserve — good rest!

3. Movement

Backed by science, exercises helps regulate chemicals in your body. Moving your body makes you feel happier, increases your energy level and improves your brain’s health.

*Important note here is to start small, you don’t want to set an achievable yet intense goal of 30 mins exercise 5 days/week when you are just starting out. Consistency is key. Our aim is to make ourselves feel good, not worse. Baby steps are just as crucial and helpful in building the momentum.

Some examples for your reference:

Daily 5 minutes exercise at a specific time
Dance crazy by yourself
Stopping off a bus/ train stop earlier and walk to destination
Yoga with friends
Morning stretches (you can find tons of such morning stretching exercises on Youtube)

4. Diet

Hydration

Cut down on junks. Those which comforts/ satisfies you in the short term, but have you paying for the consequences in the long term — i.e. feeling guilty.

5. Cleanse

Detox shower. To get rid of old and unwanted negative energies on you (Epsom salt was an ingredient I used to make bath scrubs for my dear friends hehe; there are many formulas online, pick one that sounds interesting to you and try it out).

Declutter — like Denise Linn, Marie Kondo

One of my greatest shifts in energy was after 2 intense weekend room packing sessions where I removed 5 large bags of item containing objects from about 10 years back and for which are no longer needed — textbooks, notes, clothes which others can benefit better from. Also, donating some of these old objects can make you feel wonderful because what once served you before, can now be freed for someone else who might need it so much more.

Removing items which reminds you of a past hurtful event may be difficult but crucial to the eventual goal of feeling better.

Not-To-Do list

Ever felt overwhelmed by all the things/ responsibilities you have on your plate to then realize at the end of the day that most of what you did were but miscellaneous task which do not make you feel any better about yourself?

An example included in my not to do list was a social media detox which helped me enormously as I stopped self-comparison/ getting envious of people/ stalking on folks who hurt me/ looking at the filtered happy scenes of others.

6. Take time for yourself

This can be something big/small it doesn’t matter, as long as you know at the end of the day you did something for yourself.

This could mean:

Taking 5 seconds away from people and just breathe
Packing your bed right after waking up/ getting a shower in the morning
Doing a mask before bed
Doodling and adding colors to an art creation of yours
Journaling
Learning to play a music instrument
Bringing yourself on a solo date (YES, S O L O)

7. Create new habits

Try something new on regular basis, this can help form new neural pathways and gives you something to look forward to frequently. Examples of doing something new:

Pick a different route to school/ work
Pick up a new language (through various fun apps or learn it on Youtube); it’ll be pleasurable to have an accountability partner in this with you so you can practice together
Travel elsewhere — need not be overseas, may be to nearby park/ garden/ farms/ beach; preferably areas which reminds you of being a child exploring new environments. Dora, Dora, Dora the explorer ~
Listen to a different song genre
Go for online/ free classes on something you are interested in, learning can be interesting, it need not be about academic work and you can include trying out sports/ art making/ computer skills/ personal communications and many more
Read a book

→ Increasing your knowledge through your own efforts helps build self-confidence and increase happiness while increasing your resource and ability to support yourself and others in times of needs (take it like a handy first aid kit at your side pocket), learning new information and skills can help increase your resilience and self-respect because “Hey, I learned a new skill outside school!”